Livestock Accounts for 51% of Greenhouse Gases.

Central Park’s Tavern on the Green was packed with wait staff. There were two huge white tents installed to add space. One for the actual party, one for coat check. There were about 400 people to serve 1,000 guests. As we arrived, we were directed to a tiny hallway where we should leave our stuff. However, there was nobody to look over it, they said. Take your valuables. So being in an uniform without pockets, I had to take my metrocard, my credit cards and my money. Little pissed nobody said that before. So the dance of those 300 waiters starts. We all, legal and illegal aliens, move in lines back and forth serving those thousand guests. I am reasonably happy I am doing shitty, heavy work for hours now, because the party started and at least maybe I will see very famous people. It’s speech time. The room quiets down. Everybody sits, and shuts up, like at school. I’m hanging by the stage. This man asks me for a diet coke. Certainly. I go and get it. I bring it to him. And that is how I served Bill Clinton a diet coke, with my credit card, my metrocard and my money, warm, down in my crotch.

It was not a regular desperation.This one took thirteen years to settle in. It  got inside, little by little, every other day, like a dripping faucet. At first it is unnoticeable. Then, after a few months, you hear that one drip,  at night, when you are falling asleep, and that second before you lose consciousness the drop falls and you come to. So you notice there was a slight interruption in the process. but you don’t know exactly what caused it. You fall asleep. The second drip will take hours to come and you will be solid gone by then. And then a month goes by in this patten, while the rubber ring inside the faucet rottens another half millimeter. It will take you another three years  to realize the faucet is dripping. It will, however, not bother you for another year. Now you are aware of it. You know t’s dripping but you know dripping is part of life in New York and no landlord will come running to you unless the apartment below you is flooding. Even then. If these people below don’t call someone screaming and threatening, they will show up only the next day. So you just take that paced dripping as part of your life now. It has a rhythm. It is known. You get used to it . You develop simple strategies to not hear the drip at night. Sponges are good. They absorb each drop, and as each drop unites with the other ones to be called water, it is water being soaked by the sponge, and excess just overflows or rather, underflows, down the drain, silently. You think for a second about wasting a precious finite natural resource. Then the Bond movie. Then all the water being polluted by chemicals used to make cheap leather in China, in Bangladesh,in whatever. All the Latin American people with their love to home wash their cars and hose down their sidewalks as an excuse for grown people to play with water in those hot South American days. All the billions of tons of manure being discarded in rivers by factory farms. All the faucets that are dripping at this very moment, at much smaller intervals, in all the hotels, hostels, catering halls, restaurants, commercial buildings, public buildings, prisons, orphanages, bakeries, movie studios, laundromats, car shops, fish farms,frog farms,shrimp farms, pedicures,soap factories, zoos, kindergartens, research universities, industrial laundromats, animal hospitals, all over the world., Not counting the toilets.  It takes only 8 seconds for you to convince yourself you are not the bad guy after all. Besides, the water will go down the drain, be filtered and bottled by Dannon or PepsiCo, and you will buy it back at the nearby deli in a month or so.  You also know that if you  complain to the landlord about that drip, it will take him another year to send someone to fix the problem. So you live with it, in peace, for another year.

Water is cheap. Drips don’t hurt a New York landlord’s pocket. It will take you another three years to call the landlord every three days to bother him enough to come see your faucet.It will take an interval of at least 5 seconds in between drops for you to make the call. The drops drip at an interval of one second now. It fills whatever number of gallons a day that it does not fill that you will buy back in a branded plastic bottle at the deli. The dripping faucet finally gets to you, but it is too late. Now you feel the desperation, and you will have to realize, understand, accept, process and make a sustainable exit plan from whatever fuck happened to you in the past twelve years, when the interval was of 48 hours in between drops.


I did not care about bacon.
Then I started caring.
So I stopped eating it.

After my divorce, I rented a room at a stranger’s home. One evening I went to the kitchen and found out a little mouse caught in the mouse trap. His paws bleeding, trying to free himself.  I was alone in this new place and nobody to ask for help.

The mouse had already exhausted himself trying to escape, his head was also glued, one of his eyes gone.

I put him inside a plastic bag, and took him out to the street. It was around 11 pm. No one out there . I took the iron from the closet and started to smash his head with it. I heard his screams.  I stroke him a good twenty times. I could not let this little helpless guy die slowly of starvation on that glue trap. Or be thrown alive in the garbage, as if he was a piece of something that does not feel pain.

That was not my first mouse smashing. A few years earlier, I also killed another mouse that was half dead, half chewed by my cat. I was napping one afternoon and woke up with 3 people with me in bed. The dog, the cat, and the mouse. The dog and the cat were staring at me, very excited, waiting for me to wake up to see what they brought. The mouse was wet.

Years later, a friend told me if we pour oil over the mouse, he will free himself. Next time, I will know what to do. Hopefully these things will be banned completely one day.

I never saw glue traps in Brazil. What a horrendous thing to invent.

my friend says i should write.